The last week of my maternity leave I had to take Elsie for her two month checkup. This was my first time taking Elsie to the doctors without my husband. He had to work. I wasn’t nervous. However, I was ready to get it over with.

The doctor told my husband at her last appointment, that at her next appointment, she would receive some of her shots. My mom and friends who have kids, have warned me that there is a good chance I may cry when she receives her shots. I figured that to be true, so I mentally prepared myself.

The morning of her doctor’s appointment, I put her in one of her new pink striped, summer dress with a yellow seahorse in the top right corner. As her mom, of course I had to look my best too. So I dressed in comfy pants, a cute top and 1920’s inspired hat to go with.

I parked in the parking lot, and followed COVID guidelines that the doctors’ office initiated. A couple questions later and Elsie and I were on our way in. 

As soon as we walked in, it didn’t take long until we were in our own room, waiting for the doctor. While we waited the nurse came in and checked her weight and height and gave me papers about what to expect at the age she was at (at that point she was a little over two months). The nurse let me know that the doctor would be in soon. It felt like time went incredibly slow as I waited for her arrival. I didn’t think I was nervous about Elsie getting her shots…but I was. The doctor finally came in and started talking about what type of shots she would be receiving today. I realized she was talking to me, but for some reason I couldn’t comprehend anything she was telling me, except the words “shots” and “she most likely will get a fever”. There it is. The most dreadful of sentences a new mom could hear. I was terrified. The doctor told me what I should expect and how to take care of her, once she got her fever. She told me, but I still felt like I had no idea what to do.

The nurse walked in soon after the doctor left, with needles, small jars full of liquid and pink, My Little Pony bandaids. Here we go. One each cute little thigh. I didn’t cry, but my heart broke as she cried and wailed, wondering why her mother would put her through this pain.

As we left the doctors office, I started to strategize and plan out how I was going to conquer the inevitable fever. I know the doctor told me how, but I still needed a mommy game plan. 

Since my husband was at work, I didn’t want to worry him. I wanted to prove to myself that I could handle my first “mommy challenge”…which consisted of help from my parents. I called my mom and dad to pick me up some children’s Tylenol as well as lunch from McDonalds, because I was hungry. I could have ran to the store by myself with Elsie, but I knew she wasn’t going to be up for that idea, so this seemed like the best plan.

It was around noon, when Elsie got the dreaded fever. Even though I knew all I had to do was give her a drop or so of the medicine my parents brought over, I was freaking out a little bit. I called my mom almost in tears to ask what to do. Thankfully, I have the best mom in the world, and she was able to calm me down and gave me step by step instructions. I followed her instructions, gave Elsie the medicine and we both lay down on the couch and took a nap.

As Elsie lay on my stomach sleeping, it was the most peace I have ever felt. I felt so at ease listening to her snore. It was very relaxing.

When she woke up, there was a huge smile on her face, and I knew that her fever had gone away. It was the best feeling ever.

My husband came home later that evening and I told him all about how Elsie and I survived her first fever.

Being a mom is terrifying. It is also very exhilarating and full of so much love, you don’t even know what to do with it all, but to keep loving your baby even more.